Almost no parent would like to raise a child who is unable to survive independently. It’s a basic aspect of child-rearing to build an intelligent, confident, organized, and well-mannered child. Choosing the best parenting style for a child can be challenging for parents.
Almost all parents get anxious about choosing an effective one. By choosing the best parenting style for your child, they develop healthily, and the probability of having a successful future remains high throughout their life.
Parenting Styles in Psychology: Understanding the Different Approaches
Brief History of Parenting Styles
The three parenting philosophies—permissive, authoritarian, and authoritative—were proposed by American psychologist Diana Baumrind in the 1960s. The fourth style model, referred to as uninvolved or neglectful parenting, was introduced by Eleanor Maccoby and John Martin later in the 1980s. The development of literacy is a crucial component of a child’s overall growth.
What Is a Parenting Style?
Diana Baumrind (1966) defined parenting style as “the consistent patterns of parental attitudes and behaviors that combine responsiveness and demandingness, shaping a child’s development.”
In simple terms, parenting style refers to the behavior of parents that affects the development of children; this behavior is a combination of emotional attachment, restrictions, freedom, appreciation, and rewarding gifts to the child.
The Four Main Types of Parenting Styles
Every parent has unique goals for their children. Remember, choosing the best parenting style never means sticking to only one style. In different circumstances, parents can transition between parenting styles to avoid conflicts and facilitate child growth.
Now, we will discuss the best parenting style for your child that will suit your values and goals for children’s development.
What Is Authoritative Parenting?
Introduced by: In the 1960s, American psychologist Diana Baumrind
The first style, authoritative parenting, refers to showing power and having authority. Parents set rules for their child while providing them space to follow these instructions comfortably.
Authoritative Parenting Definition
“Authoritative parenting is a child-rearing style characterized by high responsiveness and high demandingness, where parents set clear rules and expectations but also show warmth, support, and open communication.”
Reference: (Baumrind, 1966)
Understanding Characteristics of Authoritative Parents
Authoritative parenting is considered one of the best parenting styles all over the world. Parents show affection, attention, and concern for the child’s performance and development. Authoritative-style parents are highly concerned about children’s wishes and help them get their favorite things; this style fosters trust.
Authoritative parents maintain a balanced approach, enforcing firm boundaries while encouraging open communication. They remain in control but allow children opportunities to make mistakes. As a result, children learn from their experiences and develop independence and resilience.
Example of Authoritative Parenting
Parents expect children to do homework daily, and after completing work, they provide them with games to play. It is considered the best parenting style by experts.
Pros of Authoritative Parenting
- Clear boundaries for the child
- Feel loved by parents
- Emotional support for children
- Independence and self-confidence
- After failure, opportunities to try again
- Open Communication skills in children
- High self-esteem in children
- Listening and availability to children
- Build a resilient personality
- Safe and secure attachments
- Freedom to show feelings to parents
- Children are more adaptable to social situations
Cons of Authoritative Parenting
- Children mimic their parents
- Sometimes, children take instructions lightly
- Rigid boundaries sometimes result in rebellion.
- High expectations from parents
- Parents with high responsibilities
Authoritarian Parenting Style
Introduced by: In the 1960s, American psychologist Diana Baumrind
Definition of Authoritarian Parenting
A style in which parents are highly demanding and controlling, expect strict obedience, and show little warmth.
Reference: (Baumrind, 1966)
Understanding Characteristics of Authoritarian Parents
Authoritarian parents are a type of traditional parent; they place high expectations on children and train them in the strictest discipline routine. Usually, they put their orders on children by leaving no space for negotiation.
These parents occasionally show affection, specifically at times when their child achieves a goal. Authoritarian parents motivate their child through threats, guilt, and punishments. According to experts, this is not the best parenting style.
Example of Authoritarian Parenting
After an exam, a child got first in class and now wishes to go to a party, but their parents are denying it without any specific reason. Child: “Why can I not go to a party?” Parents: “Because I said no.”
Pros of Authoritarian Parenting
- Disciplined and well-mannered children
- Positive academic outcomes
- Competitive nature towards goals
- Not distracted easily
- Obedience to elders
Cons of Authoritarian Parenting
- Low decision-making capabilities in children
- Children crave affection
- Low level of self-esteem
- Unable to make choices without approval from others
- Socially handicapped and may feel social anxiety
- Higher self-doubts
- Lack of self-confidence
- Anger Issues and Anger Management
- Rebellious to parents or the world
- More chances of holding traumas throughout life
- Punishment from parents for mistakes and disobedience
- Overprotective parenting
Permissive Parenting Style
Introduced by: In the 1960s, American psychologist Diana Baumrind
Definition of Permissive Parenting
According to Diana Baumrind (1966), permissive parenting is a style in which parents are highly responsive and warm but make few demands or rules, allowing children considerable self-regulation and freedom.
Reference: (Baumrind, 1966)
Understanding Characteristics of Permissive Parents
In permissive parenting, parents play the role of a friend more than a serious parent. No defined boundaries are made for children; it is the most lenient style of parenting. Parents always support the child, without monitoring their activities.
Permissive parents do not have high claims and lack rules and regulations. Children tend to explore their surroundings as they like. A permissive parenting style often results in two extremes. Either the child gets skilled and becomes independent, or remains anxious for life.
In the view of experts, it can be the best parenting style, but it can affect the discipline in children.
Examples of Permissive Parenting
When a child refuses to eat vegetables at dinner, parents say, “It’s ok; you can order a burger.”
Pros of Permissive Parenting
- Effective parent-child relationship
- Warm and loving environment
- Open communication
- Children feel valued after receiving unconditional love
- Independence and self-expression
- Sometimes it may result in high confidence
- Open-minded growth of kids
Cons of Permissive Parenting
- Raise undisciplined children
- Children do not have guidance
- May result in academic failures
- Children face difficulty when facing opposition and strict environments
- Lack of traditional and customary values
- Unhealthy habits
- Poor balance for screen time, playing, and bedtime
- Sometimes it also results in huge financial loss
Neglectful/Uninvolved Parenting Style
Introduced by: Eleanor Maccoby & John Martin (1983, USA)
What Is Neglectful Parenting?
According to Maccoby and Martin (1983), neglectful parenting is a style characterized by low responsiveness and low demandingness, where parents show little involvement, guidance, or attention to their child’s needs.
Reference: (Maccoby & Martin, 1983)
Understanding Characteristics of Uninvolved Parents
Neglectful or uninvolved parenting involves almost no support and affection for children. Parents seldom give their children physical or emotional growth; children themselves are in charge of making decisions and caring for themselves.
Children under uninvolved parenting tend to fall into harmful habits like smoking, drug consumption, and violating rules. This is not considered the best parenting style.
Youngsters are permitted to engage in activities that pique their interest. Research reveals that the parents who adopt this style of parenting face high levels of stress in their lives. Neglectful/uninvolved parents have no demand for any kind of achievement or obedience from the child and behave unfriendly.
Among the list of best parenting styles, neglectful parenting is considered the worst choice by experts.
Example of Neglectful Parenting
The child returned from school and was hungry, but the parents were not paying attention.
Child: “Mom, I am hungry. Is there anything to eat?” Parents: “I am so busy. Find something for yourself from the fridge to eat.”
Pros of Neglectful Parenting
- Parents have almost no responsibilities.
- Children face no restrictions
- Children grow independent
Cons of Neglectful Parenting
- Low self-esteem and confidence
- Completely undisciplined children
- Children carry traumas and painful memories
- Antisocial behaviour towards people
- Children crave affection.
- Fail to make successful relationships throughout life
- Behave ethically and disobey elders
- High risk of anxiety, depression, and mental disorders in children
- Struggle with good grades
How Parenting Styles Affect Children: Clinical Significance in Psychology
According to research and theories, it has been confirmed that the personality of a child is shaped by early experiences. Choosing the best parenting style can help parents with the proper growth of their child’s development, social skills, and academic outcomes. Suppose a child is affected negatively at any developmental stage; it can be the root cause of emotional or psychological issues. In case it remains unaddressed. Parents are the only ones who nurture their child with healthy and friendly strategies.
Choosing the Best Parenting Style for Your Child
In this article, we have discussed 4 different parenting styles: authoritative, authoritarian, permissive, and neglectful/uninvolved parenting. All these styles have pros and cons, but parents may still be anxious about choosing any one style for children.
Authoritative parenting remains highly recommended as the best parenting style. Authoritarian is a balance of boundary setting, emotional support, and two-way communication between parents and child. Experts prefer this style more for choosing the best parenting style for your child.
In authoritarian parenting, rules and regulations are too strict and stressful for the child. This style is more preferred for children with autism and behavioral problems.
Permissive parenting fosters a parent-child bond, but its reality rules, regulations, and discipline shape the personality of children. It is not recommended to use this style more frequently.
The last one, the neglectful/uninvolved parenting style, has very limited positive and unlimited negative effects. This parenting style is discouraged because a child needs parents in their life, even in everyday matters. If parents are not available for the child, how will the child survive? Being antisocial, ill-mannered, and a drug user, and violating rules are drawbacks of this parenting style.
That’s why on the list of best parenting styles, neglectful/uninvolved parenting is always ranked last. Let me remind you that every child is not the same in capabilities and emotional makeup. Some need more guidance, and a few need a little clue. When parents begin to choose the best parenting style for their child, they should consider different parenting styles for alternate situations.
Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)
Is your parenting style helping or hurting?
Authoritative parenting often helps by mixing warmth with rules, while authoritarian or uninvolved styles can quietly hurt a child’s growth.
Which style leads to hidden struggles?
Authoritarian and uninvolved styles may cause struggles that aren’t visible early on. Kids can feel pressured, ignored, or have low confidence.
Parenting style guide or control your child?
Authoritative parenting style guides with support, but authoritarian tends to be more controlling. Guidance builds trust, while control can create fear.
Is your parenting style the best?
The authoritative style is often considered the most balanced; it encourages independence but still keeps boundaries that children need.
Conclusion
Parenting is never one-size-fits-all, but understanding the 4 parenting styles—authoritative, authoritarian, permissive, and uninvolved—gives you a clear map of how choices shape a child’s behavior, learning, and emotional growth.
Research often shows that the authoritative parenting style strikes the best balance between love and discipline, building confidence and independence. This is the reason why it is considered the best parenting style. On the other hand, authoritarian, permissive, and uninvolved parenting styles may bring hidden struggles that parents only notice later.